Here We Are...

I haven't posted any photos of us in a long time... I don't remember why. I had a request from a friend to see some photos, so this is for her, and anyone else who happens to see them!

Q competed in a youth triathlon. It was his first and we were all a bit nervous! He was a true champ and did really well.

All three kids have been taking tennis lessons lately... well, we're currently taking a break for the summer since we don't want our kids to turn into steamed broccoli - it's so hot!

This is actually from Christmas - just a random one stuck in the middle - I just love this picture because hugs are becoming rarer as they get older (unless you count trying to squeeze each other to death).

In April our kids ran in a 5K that went right through our neighborhood - so cool! They got to run right past our house!

Here's another random picture. This is to show that Q  is now 13, so he spends much of his time proving his coolness to the world. :)

This random picture is to show that Q thinks I'm a huge dork, now that he's 13.



We have not been taking as much advantage of the Florida beaches as we should, but we're committed to repenting of that this summer.

L competed with a gymnastics team for several months this last year. She really enjoyed it! Unfortunately, most of the meets were on Sunday, so we encouraged her to try tennis instead. Tennis is fun, too. :)

D was a spider in his school play. Each year, every grade at the elementary school gets to do their own play and every student is involved. They totally love it!

For Father's Day, L made a tie for R at her church youth  group, called Activity Days. It turned out very handsome!

Another handsome tie L made was this duct tape bow tie. R wore it to church one Sunday and received a lot of compliments, as you can imagine.

In a nutshell, our kids are nuts. Like all kids, right? I love it when they're being nuts... as long as they also have a smile on their faces... and they're not ruining furniture. Otherwise, nuts is good.

News Flash!

Just a quick update... we're not moving! This is about the time when we're expected to be moving to a new state, or house, or something. But, we decided to break from tradition, by staying put! So, if you were wondering if we might be thinking about moving, we're not! And now you know. :)

Also, we're all healthy and happy and haven't been eaten by alligators... yet. And, we have a cat now.

Scissors Done Me Wrong

I am suffering from the side effects of a bad haircut. While the majority of these are temporary (hair does grow out... eventually) they are real and emotionally scarring.

These side effects include:

-Loss of self-esteem

-Camera shyness

-Moodiness

-Increased hat-wearing

-Increased appetite

-Feelings of regret

-Spousal drowsiness (he's totally bored of hearing me complain about it)

There is little that can be done at this point, due to the expensive nature of my bad haircut... and the gutless nature of me. I know I should go back and complain, but I just can't. I can get another haircut, but as I mentioned I spent a lot on this haircut and I can't bring myself to shell out more dough for a potentially bad haircut. Really, ANY haircut is a potentially bad one.

So, for now I will have patience... and hats.

New Old Dogs

We just got some new old dogs. Dogs that are new to us, but old. I suppose it's like a new old car, but these dogs weren't detailed before we got them. A coworker of R's had too many dogs and they're gone most of the day... so these two poor, old pups needed more attention.

You must know we've never (ever) in our marriage said, "Let's have two dogs... two is better than one." It was more like, "One dog will be nice... someday... when we've recovered from our previous attempt at owning a crazy dog. Maybe a dog that is so small you can forget it's in the room and it could dig in the yard all day and still not make a dent. Like a tiny, weak, dog that doesn't know how to bark. That's the dog for us."

Well, to my surprise R suggested that we go check out these dogs and MAYBE bring ONE home. Yippee! We go and see these very cute, shed-monsters and I'm half happy, half wanting to cry. "Well..." we say to the kids, "should we take one of these dogs home for the weekend?" You know, to try it out. "Oh, no," says R's co-worker, "they're a pair... I was wanting to keep them together, they've aways been together." Pause, pause pause. "Okay," says R "we could try it out." *CONK* (that's the sound of my jaw hitting the floor... and the sound I imagine my big, giant tears of regret will make when they fall on the ground). But, I'm still half happy, too. I love dogs and my children have wanted a dog every day of their lives. Little, baby L would say, "Ga-ga, goo-goo, doggie." I swear (not really).

So we take them home and they go running around the house sniffing everything. Then they go in the back yard and bark at the squirrels. Then they come inside and lay down... and just stay that way for the rest of the day. Until we get their leashes out and they are SO excited to go on a walk! We walk them through our neighborhood feeling like dog-owners (yeah). Then we come home and they lay down... and stay that way for the rest of the day. So, we've kind of got a sweet deal going here.

We made it through the weekend and felt 110% sure that these dogs would be a good fit here! L said, "Let's see if the dogs want us?!" when we suggested that the dogs should live here permanently. How cute is that? Way.

So our new old dogs are named Kylie and Tyler (these are the names they've had for ten years, so I think they deserve to keep them). They are eleven or twelve years old, litter mates and best friends. It's seriously the sweetest thing on earth the way they look after one another and HATE to be apart. They were with the same kind, loving family for ten years and it shows in their behavior. Other than really wanting so badly to get ahold of a squirrel, they've shown themselves to be as gentle as can be. Even when I gave them a bath with cold hose water they just stood there, because I told them to. I hope they rub off on my kids.

I actually caught Kylie "winking" at the camera!

Tyler is giving me the paparazzi paw here. He just wants his privacy, but I just want to post pictures of him on the Internet.

Breaking Point

Today I told a baby spider to go to hell. I feel bad about that. This is out of my character for two reasons: I am a great respecter of babies - even creepy ones - and, I rarely admit to using that kind of language. I realized afterward that I had reached my breaking point.

It started when we first visited Gainesville and everyone kept encouraging us to go see some gators at Lake Alice. So, we did go to Lake Alice but we didn't see any alligators. The unseen threat is far more stressful than the lazing threat asleep at the edge of the water. I'm not "afraid" of gators, per se, but they do in fact kill from time to time. So, threat number one.

Then a couple of months ago, before we moved, I saw an article that said armadillos can carry a leprosy virus. Well, there are lots of armadillos in Gainesville (mostly they are dead on the roadside from what I've seen). Leprosy from armadillos, threat number two.

On the way to Gainesville we stayed in several hotels. While I used to thoroughly enjoy hotel stays I now only partly enjoy them because I've read/heard several sources that say bed bugs are sometimes in hotel rooms and you can easily transport them to your home after staying in a hotel. So, once we actually moved into our home I was on the lookout for stowaway bed bugs now living in our home. I saw lots of bugs, fortunately none of them were the "bed" variety, but it was still on my mind. Threat number three (in case you've lost count - 'cuz I know I'm rambling here).

Then the bug guy gave me a big lecture on termites ("not if, but when" blah, blah, blah), the moving van driver told me he saw a four foot snake next to my yard, the neighbor girl confirmed the snake threat and added that she had personally seen two coral snakes ("red next to yellow, kill a fellow" blah, blah, blah), our friend's son got a chigger in his arm and a wolf spider - a really big one - crawled out of my garbage bin while I was throwing stuff away, jumped off the bin and onto the garage floor. He crawled away out of sight which wouldn't be a really big deal except that I was bare foot. That's threat four, five... anyway, you get the point.

It's not that Florida has more threatening elements than any other place I've lived, it's just the initial discovery of all the threatening elements that can bring a new resident to his or her breaking point. I'm usually pretty good about spiders - in fact, I like to catch them and show them to my kids just so I can get "cool mom" points - but I feel like the spiders are just being too aggressive here. There are boundaries that should be respected! Live and let live... just live on the OUTSIDE of my space. Okay? Not so hard.

So, I'd like a offer an official apology to the baby spider I condemned to a fiery death earlier. I should have just squished it with my big toe like I usually do.

Understatement

It's been a while since I last posted.

We've moved to Gainesville, FL. Gee, another move? Bet you didn't see that coming! Well, it's the last for a LOOOOOONG time - like many years, possibly even decades. Trust me. The good thing about that is that we LOVE it here! Gainesville is totally our kind of town. You should visit. You can stay in our guest bedroom. We'll chase the gators away before you arrive.

This is our new home. It's on an 1 1/2 acres and has lots of trees, of course. It's an older house, but that's okay because it gives us something to complain about. We're bored of complaining about how hot and humid it is, so we're just complaining about expensive house repairs full time.

This is our dining room. Carpet (it's clean, at least... for now), fancy chandelier and flowery wallpaper. If you are like my daughter, L, you'll be mad at me when I rip this all out. This light fixture makes her "feel like we're rich." Hmmm, it's hard to be the crusher of a little girl's fantasy.

To prove that we do in fact live in Florida, I'm posting this picture of an alligator (or "gators" as we call them here - not to be confused with "The Gators" which represents all that is strong and true here in Gainesville - oops, I mean the world). R took this picture in our backyard. Just kidding - it was the neighbor's backyard. No, please don't believe that because then you won't visit.... or you'll be here too much depending on what you call an ideal vacation.

In closing, I will pledge to blog more often. I will also pledge to remove wallpaper and replace old, fancy light fixtures asap. Sorry, Miss L.

Five Steps for Success

Today is Fast Sunday, always a mixture of joy and pain. :)

I love hearing the testimonies of other people. I find it amazing how often my prayers are answered by others' testimonies. Today was no exception.

A woman in my ward shared that when she sets aside her own "logic" and puts her trust in the Lord, the results are always better than she anticipated. This was exactly what I needed to hear today. So many times, I pray for an answer and receive communication from the Holy Spirit... then I talk myself into a confused mess because I couldn't just trust the answer I was given.

Here are my new five steps for success:

1. Pray
2. Receive an answer
3. Do
4. Get blessings
5. Repeat

Life is...

In Tucson, trying to stay cool (I think that's why I picked such a "cool" background here)! Life is hard, life is good, life is... a gift. I am, at times, an ungrateful recipient of my Heavenly Father's gift, so I will just take this opportunity to say, "Thank you, Heavenly Father."


A poem, by Carol Lynn Pearson-

Perspective from Mortality
My life is patterned as the palm
Of a rain-washed leaf, calm,
Cut and full.
But
I view my life from underneath,
Which - like the patterned leaf -
Is fuzzed and dull.

Transcending Ordinary Methods

One of my very favorite books is "A Rational Theology" by John D. Widtsoe. Last night, R and I had an awesome conversation about the many mind-blowing principles that make the gospel of Jesus Christ so... well, there just aren't really adequate words to describe that. Perhaps, I should just say that when a person feels the truth, it is unlike any other feeling this earth offers.

This is just one of the many amazing teachings Elder Widtsoe offers in his book:

"By the holy spirit, which fills every person, man may obtain information from the Lord. By its means come the messages which transcend the ordinary methods of acquiring knowledge. By it man may readily communicate with God, or God with him."

Wow.

What Do I Hold?

John 14:27 - Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.


Russel M. Nelson (of the Quorom of the Twelve) remarks about this scripture, "His peace is not necessarily political; His peace is personal. But that spirit of inner peace is driven away by contention."

We live in a world so contentious, that media companies make serious profits by pitting two opposing sides against one another and we eat it up. As experts "debate" the issues of the day, we allow contention into our lives.

I believe it's our responsibility to stay informed about what's happening in the world and be involved. Can we do this without participating in contentious argument... the kind that doesn't actually solve problems or work towards solutions? Do we have to listen to "our" side bash the "other" side? Can we have inner peace while feeling politically contentious?


Proverbs 11:12 - He that is void of wisdom despiseth his neighbour: but a man of understanding holdeth his peace.

Simplify

Now that we are moving... again(!), I'm feeling a need to simplify my life and all that encompasses. I've been ignoring this blog for quite some time because I feel too overwhelmed by it. Solution? Simplify. I will, for the time being, be posting spiritual thoughts and other such quick-ish things. I feel so fortunate for the progress I've made lately in the spiritual arena, due to many lovely people whom have been helping me better understand the gospel. I intend to express my gratitude by sharing my experiences with the outpouring of love our Heavenly Father and Savior provide through the scriptures and through the small, and large, experiences in my life.

In 1 Nephi 11, of the Book of Mormon, Nephi sees the vision of the tree of life and of the virgin Mary, mother of Jesus. At one point during his vision, Nephi is asked by an angel if he understands. He replies:

"I know that He loveth his children; nevertheless I do not know the meaning of all things. (1 Nephi 11:17)"

I love this scripture because it illustrates that we don't have to understand the depths of the gospel to know that our Heavenly Father loves us. We can study our scriptures and learn more, progressing in our understanding... but we don't have to posses all the answers to know that we are loved... perfectly. What a blessing.

Advice from Elder Busche

The link below is a video... I saw this on someone's blog and had to put a link here. It happened to be EXACTLY what I needed to remember tonight; it is EXACTLY what we all need to remember each day and night.

Advice from Elder Busche

I Wish that Little, Strawberry Hat Still Fit

This is L, five or six years ago. We are hiking in New Jersey during a camping trip that didn't exactly go well. We all got ticks, the weather was hot and soggy and the mosquitoes were hungry and out for revenge (or so it seemed). I'm pretty sure we ended up coming home early. So, this picture doesn't exactly represent the fondest of memories.



Yet, this photo begs for my presence. I would LOVE to go back there... even for a moment. This photo of little, adorable L and several dozen of my children from years past have been haunting me lately. The other day, after watching an hour's worth of home videos, I told R that I would pay $5,000 to go back for one day and be with my babies again. My youngest is still four and my oldest is not yet ten, but I'm still feeling that horrible panic that I'm sure every mother eventually confronts; I'm realizing that watching your children grow is like a perpetual losing of them at the same time. I will never again play with two-year old L, I can't hold baby Q again and D will never toddle his first step in front of me. These thoughts make my gut wrench in pain and my eyes fill with tears.



Its not that I don't appreciate them as they are now. It feels like MAGIC to watch your kids grow and learn and become more and more of who they were born to be. When you have a baby, though, you are their universe. My four year old is totally into the solar system and frequently rehearses facts like, "Pluto is a dwarf planet because its so small, right?" I'm so proud that he's aware of the actual universe! Only... he's aware that I'm just a tiny little piece of the universe. I'm just mom the person, no longer MOM the everything.



I MISS MY BABIES! And, they're never coming back.



This isn't a feeling of being "baby hungry" (though any baby makes me feel all squishy on the inside since I have none at home any longer). Its just that they are changing and I can't keep up. Someday, they will be so changed that they will forget they ever needed me so much. That's good. That's life. That's scary.



I know the big picture here is to make every moment count. My kids don't actually belong to me in every sense, I know that. I'm fortunate beyond words to have them with me for the time they're here. Once they're grown and on their way, I'll savor what I can get: a couple of phone calls here and there, some emailed pictures of grand kids, maybe the privilege to visit on occasion? Actually, I think being a Grandparent is going to be awesome - I can't wait... NO! NO! I can wait, I can wait!



P.S.



Lately, D has been really into Star Wars: Return of the Jedi. We've seen it five times in the last ten days... at least. My favorite line in the movie (and I could pick several) is when Han Solo tells Chewbacca to "Fly Casual." I think that's great advice - sort of like "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff."

More Contrast + Mel Skonut = L.O.V.E.

I know I have been a major slacker in the blogging department. Perhaps, R will do a little better? I'm not sure... he is probably twice as busy as I am. Either way, I'm totally impressed with his skills and want to share his new blog address. Check out R's newest hobby here:

http://more-contrast.blogspot.com

Like Sands Through the Hourglass...

Lately, the days of our lives have been jam packed with many goings-on... some wonderful, some mundane, but it never seems to let up. I'm grateful for each moment (and I only slightly resent the fact that I have very little blogging time left!).

Over Thanksgiving, we took a trip down to White Sands National Monument in New Mexico. It was surreal...

(p.s. all the white stuff here is not snow, it's white sand... makes sense, right?)

Happy #7

For seven years now, I have been trying to crack the code that would open L's mental vault and show me what this sweet, lovely firecracker is all about.

For seven years, I have been unable to get inside L's mind. To me, she remains an enigma. I have, from time to time, been able to predict her behavior. On occasion, she and I will see eye to eye. Once in a while I can even convince her that she might see things my way.

For the most part, L is dancing to her own tune.

For seven years now, L has been growing, moving, pushing limits and living each moment like she owns it.

I love my L... though she doesn't really feel like mine; I think that I might belong to her.

Cool

iPhones are so cool. I downloaded this great app ("application" for those not familiar) that lets you recolor parts of a photo. This photo is of my dad years ago - it was a color photo originally, so the car was, in fact, red.

Ch-Ch-Changes

Life is always changing, but lately I have personally had a few big changes.

I started school. I'm going to a community college - starting at square one - and working towards getting into the nursing program. I'm only taking a couple classes per semester until little D is a big Kindergartner, so I'll be doing this for a long time...

I cut my hair. It had gotten pretty long, so this was a drastic change. However, I am no stranger to a short hairstyle so it hasn't been weird to me - just weird for my friends here in New Mexico that have only known me with long hair.

I had Lasik surgery. This, strangely enough, has been the hardest change for me. I'm really happy I did it and have no regrets - it's great! - but I didn't realize that I would miss my glasses. I've worn glasses basically since I was seven years old. When something has been a part of your face for that long, it feels a little... sad to be without it. I'm a total crackpot, I know! Give me a few more weeks and I will be 100% glad to be glasses free, instead of 80%.

If Only

You know when you are a kid and you get new shoes, and your certain that they will most definitely make you run faster?

I just spent $150 on new running shoes and I have to tell you, I have some pretty high hopes for these babies.

Tears on Her Pocket Folder

I just got back from taking Q and L to the first day of school. I was really looking forward to getting back into the school schedule, but I am already missing my big kids.

Three days ago, L was in tears because she just couldn't wait to start first grade. "I can't wait!" she howled repeatedly. Last night, I reminded her that school was starting the next morning. She began to sob, "I'm not ready for first grade! I want to just go back to kindergarten!" I realize this emotional range is not completely abnormal, I'm just having a hard time keeping up!

This morning she seemed totally fine, until we got out of the car at the school parking lot. I told them to pose for a picture and L asked me to wait until she wiped her tears away. She was trying so hard to keep it together, poor dear. We made it into the building and classroom holding hands tightly. Once we were in the classroom, the tears really let loose. The really funny thing is that she didn't even hesitate last year - first day of kindergarten was a piece o' cake!

We walked around, checking out ways in which the room was the same as last year's and ways in which it was even better. I then told her it was time for me to leave.

"Be brave, okay?" says me.

"Okay." says brave, little L.

Q requested that he walk to his classroom all by himself. Fourth grade is a time for sophistication, I suppose.